A Writer's 21st Century Memoir.

The Department Store Diaries: Day 7

“Hello, I can help you over hear ma’am.” It was the beginning of the day and I had just opened the store when a middle aged woman walked up to the counter.

“Yes, I would like to purchase these three items.” The lady at the counter set two similarly ugly shirts and a gaudy looking bracelet down on top of my scanner. I quickly rang the woman’s purchase at the counter and started to grab a shopping bag.

“Umm, you know what? Can I ring this shirt and this bracelet up separately?”

“Sure ma’am, no problem.” I exited out of the current screen and then rescanned the items according to her request. “Okay, here you go.”

“No, I changed my mind. Can I get the two shirts separated from the bracelet?”

I started to become frustrated with the woman at the counter. “Yes MA’AM. I’ll be HAPPY to scan these items a third time.” Another older couple came up behind the lady at the counter while I was angrily stuffing her purchase into the bag for a third time.

“You know what? Can I get the other shirt and the bracelet together on a gift receipt and then the other shirt separately?” I glared at the woman making the evil demands.

The couple standing happily behind the lady popped up from the now snaking line and began to start a conversation with me.

“Are you a Christian young lady?” The elder woman asked me as I was rescanning items.

“Yes ma’am.” I didn’t know how the question was relevant to retail, but I just humored her.

“Thank goodness. That’s great to hear. There are too many people out there that need Jesus. You see that lady right there?” She was pointing to my elder coworker who had been working at the store for over twenty years.

“Yes, I see her ma’am.”

“Well, her husband is a preacher at the church I go to. We need to make sure everyone hears about the Lord Jesus.” The woman started raising her hands to the ceiling and shaking her fists in some sort of solo celebration. “Praise Jesus,” she gently whispered to the store’s ceiling.

“Okay, will that be all ma’am?” I turned to the other crazy lady with the rude requests standing in front of me.

“Yeah.” She suddenly grabbed her bag and walked out of the front door in a fast pace.

I had no idea what made her suddenly so upset. With all this soul saving at the register you would

think she’d be at least amused if shewasn’t a Christian. Maybe she worshipped the devil? I thought to myself.

 

Read the madness from the beginning.

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