A Writer's 21st Century Memoir.

A Documented Case of Macaroni

She held her bright blue spoon, with her right hand that was connected to an aloft elbow held up so high, that one would think that she was a one winged bird trying to take flight. She eagerly slopped up huge shovel-full scoops of the yellow cheese pasta at a rate that would give the most competitive eaters a run for their money. She thought to herself how garlic would taste if the tiny grounded white flakes of tangy goodness were sprinkled into her dish, but she couldn’t ponder on it too much because she had already gone through three-fourths of the way of her giant bowl of macaroni. She let the tender pieces of gold move about her mouth as she quickly chewed and swallowed what she thought was a gift from God.

“Oh my God!” she said looking down into her nearly finished lunch. “This must be a gift from heaven!”

Having already mentioned this to the reader, and now moving on…

Uh hem…

The girl with the now finished bowl of macaroni swallowed her last bites of Kraft American cheese, and wiped the remainders that had escaped her mouth with the back of her hand in such a way that would be viewed as an unsanitary manner to the narrator.

“I can hear you narrating in my head you know.” The girl spoke up and off into the ceiling like she was looking for a ghost.

“No really. I can hear you right now” she mentioned again as she stood up and walked over towards the only closed door in the kitchen. “Wait—are you in my pantry?”

Umm

“Can you just stop narrating my lunch please?” She was now facing the pantry and speaking to it as if she was a crazed lunatic. “No one asked you to do this. Please stop before I come in there.”

Come in where?

The girl started to reach for the pantry door. “Where you are a**hole” and swung the door open to greet the narrator with a very scary look on her face and-OH MY GOD! 

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